Claim Your Space

My friend  Kira Goldenberg just shared this on her twitter feed and I am aghast and enraged. Why? Because I trained my own daughter to give up her space  and choose avoidance in the name of manners, politeness and staying safe. I really felt like punching something. It is raining but it is the perfect time to use that punch inducing energy to walk in a straight line like I belong and see how many people I bump into. Please do not mistake this manifesto as opposing the logic of  weaving through pedestrian traffic in a tourist filled environment, rush hour, or when High Schools let their students out into subway stations. I taught Mag how to do that too and we are both impressive to watch in action.  I  will come back with provisions for cookies and soup.

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8 thoughts on “Claim Your Space

    • Interesting. After coming back form my swaggering walk (while passing SUVs soaked me with splashing water) I realized that it is an entitlement thing. Naturally men feel comfortable entitlement, but so do rich white women, and every tween and teen of either gender when they take over the sidewalk or the CVS in packs. Also many years ago I discovered that if you do not make eye contact and do not break stride, crowds part instinctively like herds. >

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      • I used to actually LOVE walking through Grand Central at rush hour, with everyone moving at top speed and never touching at all, you could always tell when a newbie was in the crowd because they hadn’t developed the extrasensory perception needed to do that… and entitlement YES! that’s it completely and I don’t want to be like that.

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  1. This is timely as I’ve been thinking about this for the last couple weeks and just today in fact. The first was the train ride into NYC for my Visa. It was an early train into NYC on a weekday so it was packed and I couldn’t find a seat so I stood. There were three other women standing with me. As I looked around all of the men were sitting. Fine. But then I noticed all of the newspapers on the empty seats beside them, and their laptops, briefcases, jackets, taking up empty seats. I wondered if they thought about us standing there, did they have a glimmer of thought like maybe I should move this and ask if she wants to sit? I don’t know. But then I was pissed because my back started hurting and I thought maybe I should just go over and sit like they do to me, only they manspread and of course have to invade my space somehow. But no, my inside voice just said suck it up and I stood there in pain. Dummy. Then in the coffee shop last week there was a long line and the man in front of me was on his phone texting and as the line moved up he stayed in place on his phone. I was so far back that I was blocking the pathway for people to get in and out easily and he had like 6 spaces in front of him so I said, “Excuse me, do you mind moving up as I don’t want to block the pathway.” And he looked at me and said “of course you don’t”. WTF does that mean? Of course I said nothing. How do you respond to that? And finally today walking down the sidewalk on the Ave I realized I kept walking off the sidewalk to keep out of people’s way and I started to think why do I keep moving and letting everyone else (ok, men) stay their course and walk in a straight line? Ugh. I’m going to share and just let it out. I just got diagnosed with breast cancer and I’m pissed. I think I’m going to start sitting on the train and walking in a straight line!!!

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    • Virabhadrasana I and II for real. You will not only reclaim your space and your health, but realign this glitch with all the good things that have been happening in your life recently. Answers on how to proceed will start coming in. there is a whole community of yogis who are victorious on this one. Onward with plenty of back up. xooxox

      P.S. I wrote this last night and have been trying to post this for the 4th time right now and each time I open it is has been erased! WordPress!! what are you doing??

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