Starting tomorrow Monday, I will be very busy melting, kneading, and sauteing food using the 4 lbs of butter I have in my refrigerator. I might have time to snort, fume and hopefully smile  at what I read on social media in the next 3 days but do not foresee writing anything this coming week. During these last few days I have had a chance to reflect on how we use the term gratitude when we really mean relief. and the term compassion when we really mean pity. gratitude is more like wow! this or that is way more wonderful than I realized, and I already thought it was pretty great. Relief is more like phew! dodged that bullet, or thank god or goodness that this or that is not happening to me. A lot of what we list as gratitude is really relief when we realize that we have avoided suffering. Particularly the suffering we se others experience. Similarly we think compassion and pity are related when they so are not. Pity means I am glad I am not you or experiencing your discomfort. Compassion is realizing I am you and we both are affected by what happens to you. Pity attracts fear and dread, you help so the suffering of others stops bothering you. Compassion attracts courage and optimism, you help because it feels personal, intimate and uplifting. Gratitude is celebratory, Relief is merely a break from constant worry. May we all experience gratitude for our capacity for compassion. xoxoxoxoxoxo


4 thoughts on “Definitions

    • Ha! Why don’t you come and say that to my face? Seriously, cannot wait to see you. We will buy more butter. I also would like to clarify that it is entirely cool and natural for relief to come before gratitude. Allthough in reverse, I think that is how the saying “comparisons are all odious” came about. Also Canada cool DLP aka Danielle LaPorte reminded me today that gratitude does not originate from obligation. >


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